Thursday, August 13, 2009

WELL TODAY WAS A VERY LONG, BUT WONDERFUL DAY. JUDD AND I SPENT THE DAY WITH OUR VERY GOOD FRIENDS, TONY AND CANDIE, AND THEIR DAUGHTER. WE WENT TO THE FAIR. IT WAS NOT TOO BAD.
WADE SHOWS IS NO LONGER THERE. IT IS NOW A DIFFERENT COMPANY. THERE WAS A FEW CHANGES, STILL COST YOU AN ARM AND LEG THOUGH.
OUR FRIENDS OUR ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL PEOPLE TO BE AROUND. I LOVE THEIR COMPANY.
TONIGHT IS THE FIRST TIME THEY HAVE LEFT THEIR DAUGHTER WITH US.
TOMORROW CANDIE HAS SURGERY. WE ARE VERY WORRIED. SHE IS IN REMISSION NOW FROM A RARE BLOOD CANCER. THERE IS A VERY STRONG CHANCE THAT THE SURGERY COULD BRING THE CANCER BACK, BUT SHE HAS TO HAVE IT DONE. PLEASE KEEP HER IN YOUR PRAYERS.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

BLOGGING....

WHEN I WAS FIRST SHOWN THIS SITE I REALLY DID NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT IT WAS ALL ABOUT. I THOUGHT IT WAS KIND OF NEAT BECAUSE I COULD KEEP UP WITH PEOPLE THAT WE KNOW. BUT NEVER COULD I GET ON HERE AND SHARE OUR DAY-TO-DAY LIFE. AS MOST PEOPLE KNOW, I AM A VERY PRIVATE PERSON.
BUT NOW AS I READ OTHER PEOPLES BLOGS, I THINK TO MYSELF, WOW! VERY ENCOURAGING. NO MATTER WHAT ONE PERSON WRITES ABOUT, SHE ALWAYS HAS WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT. I READ MANY PRAYER REQUEST. I ALSO READ ABOUT ALL THE HARD WORK PEOPLE ARE DOING TO KEEP THEIR FARMS RUNNING AS THEY SHOULD.
SO I HAVE DECIDED THAT I WILL TRY TO SHARE SOME OF OUR LIFE, MY THOUGHTS, CARES AND CONCERNS WITH THE WORLD.
I WOULD LIKE TO START WITH A VERY SERIOUS PRAYER REQUEST.
AS MOST KNOW I HAVE NOT BEEN A VERY GOOD MOTHER AT ALL. I COULD PLACE BLAME ON OTHERS, BUT THAT WOULD JUST BE AVOIDING THE FACT THAT I AM THE ONE WHO HAS FAILED.
I AM GONNA HAVE TO GO BACK TO COURT TO SEE BY BOYS AGAIN. EVERY TIME THIS HAPPENS IT JUST CAUSES THEM MORE PAIN. HOWEVER, I HAVE BEEN TOLD THAT MY OLDEST SON HAS GOTTEN INTO SOME SERIOUS TROUBLE WITH THE LAW.
I HAVE BEEN TOLD THAT THE BLAME FALLS ON MY ON ME. AT FIRST, I WAS ANGRY. NOT AT MY SON BUT AT THEM. HOW CAN THIS BE MY FAULT? BUT IT IS ME WHO IS TO BLAME.
NOW I JUST PRAY FOR THE WISDOM TO DO ALL THE RIGHT THINGS, THE COURAGE TO GO BACK TO COURT, AND TO BE THERE FOR MY CHILDREN. TO BE THE PARENT I AM SUPPOSED TO BE.

Sunday, August 9, 2009

FINDING OUR WAY BACK

I AM NOT AT ALL A RELIGOUS PERSON. I USED TO THINK GOD HATED ME, IF THERE REALLY WAS A GOD. I HAVE A HUGE PROBLEM WITH FAITH. I NEVER UNDERSTOOD HOW ANYONE COULD BELIEVE IN WHAT THEY COULD NOT SEE.
MY HUSBAND ON THE OTHER HAND IS A FIRM BELIEVER. HE KNOWS THERE IS A GOD.
I DO NOT BELIEVE WE CAME FROM AN APE OR A FISH...NOTHING IGNORANT LIKE THAT! I JUST DID NOT UNDERSTAND.
SOMEONE, WE WILL CALL JIM, ONCE SAID TO ME THAT YOU SHOULD NOT HAVE HATE IN YOUR HEART. (NOT HIS EXACT WORDS) IT IS A SIN TO HATE.
MY HEART HAS BEEN A BLACK HOLE FILLED WITH HATE FOR 20 LONG YEARS. I HAVE NEVER LEARNED TO LET GO.
I HAVE HIT WHAT MOST KNOW AS "ROCK BOTTOM". SO MANY I HAVE MADE ALL THE SAME MISTAKES. NEVER LEARNING THAT NOTHING GOOD COMES FROM ANYTHING BAD.
SO, NOW I AM TRYING TO GET MY LIFE ON THE RIGHT PATH.